Ooops - Clumsy Me!

I am without a shadow of a doubt a clums moo. This is a great skill built up over many years due to intense training. Today was another me classic, where I managed to break the ‘mrs’ phone charger by sucking it up the Dyson and ripping it in two. The strange electrical smell was rather interesting. I do feel sorry for the ‘mrs’ having the live with me. I have broken glasses, two dishes, two toilet seats (okay one, which I broke twice) and a radiator. Not bad going.

Not only am I clumsy but I am electrical. Seriously I am. I can blow light bulbs just by turning on the light. I don’t mean coincidence, I mean repeatedly. I was always frightened working in an office because I got electrical shocks from photocopiers, door handles, chair legs, filing cabinets and other people. I tried various experience with different kinds of shoes, floor surfaces and clothes but to no avail. I always close the car door with a sleeve over my hand, with my foot or by pushing the glass, in response to some bad electrically experiences. Don’t even get me started on shopping centres. I swear those escalators act as some of huge Van der Graff generator that discharges itself on me, when I reach the metal railings at the top. In addition people scare me. People should learn to stay away as it often results with being shocked when handed something. Maybe it’s just my magnetic personality – boom boom!

It was suggested once that I could have some dyspraxic tendencies especially as it ties in with the need for social justice. I looked up the symptoms, one of which was difficulty in communicating verbally, so I thought this was definitely not me. If there was a metal for talking I was be a gold medal winner. Nothing deep and meaningful you understand!

I just have to reside to the fact that I am a person that must always have household insurance and a good broom to hand!